i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
