he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
