At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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