Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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