well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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