Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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