Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize