good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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