what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
