i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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