You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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