Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize