i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
