THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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