Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
