just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
