Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
