yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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