The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
