Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
