road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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