Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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