Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
