You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
You took a bar mat shot.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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