Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
