A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
