roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
