Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
We don't watch enough power rangers
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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