I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
