the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
