I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm too high and old for this...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
