My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize