I just cut my nipple shaving
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
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