why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
