she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
