and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Randomize
