You just made me feel so damn special
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
