sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
