Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
