a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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