he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
