all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
