The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
