Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
