We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
