My nipple is on Facebook.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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