Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
