Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
