YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
