just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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